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I had something precious. It was given to me at my mother’s death in 1989. I loved it and looked at it often, but I never used it. I brought it from its safe place and put it on the kitchen counter. Then I had a surgery and a whole bunch of other family and professional complications. I did not have time to use it.

I thought I put it back in its place. I did not. Now it is lost.

I know it is in my house somewhere, but where? I have searched my house.  As I went through all the old stuff, some of it is precious to me, some of it is useless. (Really, I believe in Consumer Reports, but the 2009 report on dishwashers probably won’t help me much.)  I have found magazines from 1983. I have found a book of client’s phone messages from 1995. (If I did not return your call, please call me again!)

Then I found another precious book, one which formed my beliefs about food and our bodies. I want to read it again.  I will be sharing that author’s wisdom with you in the weeks to come.

This made me think about how we eat. We tend to eat as our parents taught us. Is that really the way the body needs to be fed?

Does the way you eat, were taught to eat, or were forced to eat, does that serve you now? Is your eating a habit, emotion, or a choice? I see that the food we eat today, is very different from the food we ate then. Which is better for you?

As I searched my house for the lost object, I came face to face with the truth. I am not spending the time and energy I ought to on certain things. I have not cooked and prayed and exercised and taken care of myself with food as I should. I have not been consistent with the self-care behaviors that really work for me.

As you know, clutter grows. Now I have been working really hard on creating these blogs for you, on the website, on playing musical secretaries, and on arguing with insurance companies.  I had my foot/ankle surgery – twice now, and by the time you read this, my husband, daughter, grand dog and I will have had fifteen surgical procedures among us so far this year.

Life is limited. We will not have the time to do all the things we have dreamed of and planned. We will not have the time to enjoy our two-year-old grandsons, when they are seven. Look at what you really want, please. Choose to do the things for which you have a passion and take care of yourself in a way that will allow you to do that.

How much does your food obsession rule your life choices?

Will it take more time or less time to eat abstinently? Count the shopping, packing, and schlepping. Count the 12 step meetings and step work and prayer. Compare it with the craving, obsessing, and arguing you have with yourself when you are eating. Compare it with the cost of your binge and drug foods; the time you spend on them, planning, sneaking, hiding. The time you spend in self-hatred, the time you spend buying clothes that soon won’t fit. Consider the physical, emotional, mental, spiritual and medical problems you are creating by eating this way.

What do you really want in your life? What kind of life do you want to create?

My life has not come out quite as I planned it, but there is much good. I am doing a few things to fix this problem.

  • From April 1, 2018 to today and from now on, I am spending 15 minutes organizing or cleaning something in my house.
  • Last week, I saw no clients. I did what I felt needed to be done.
  • This week, I am backing down from some commitments and increasing my time to take care of myself.
  • This blog is short, so I can go rest.

Please leave a comment. I love to hear what you have to tell me.

Blessings to you,



  1. Kathy Montrey July 24, 2018 at 12:00 pm #

    Very good Theresa. I am retired now and I will be turning 70 in October. I am finding that I am making different choices for myself then when I was younger. I just came back from Niagara Falls – a place I have wanted to see for over 20 years. Why did it take me so long to get there? I was like a little kid I was thrilled just to watch the falls. In my spare time which I have plenty of I am making scrapbooks for each of my three children. I am enjoying taking that walk down memory lane – remembering all the joys and some of the sorrows of their childhoods. I am not perfectly abstinent all the time but for the most part I eat more healthy these days. Its not a vanity thing anymore it’s about my health. I get a fair amount of exercise. I have recently gotten back to country line dancing which I love, I have a dog which I have to walk a couple times a day and I belong to the Y where I swim two or three times a week. One of the things that the 12 step programs has given me – and it took a long time – was to stop shaming myself for not being perfect!

    • H. Theresa Wright July 28, 2018 at 7:06 pm #

      Wonderful! Enjoy this precious season of your life.

  2. Mimi July 24, 2018 at 1:56 pm #

    Good perspective about being conscious and making conscious decisions about how we spend are time and staying focused on important tasks! What are the priorities? What other things “clutter” my thinking and my choices? Not all clutter is visible and tangible. Thank you for sharing these helpful insights, Theresa!

    • H. Theresa Wright July 28, 2018 at 7:05 pm #

      So glad you liked this, Mimi, and so good to hear from you again.

  3. Jennifer B July 24, 2018 at 10:12 pm #

    Wow Theresa. Your blogs are always so powerful and always what I need to hear. I have been struggling with my abstinence of white flour over the last several weeks. And I really like what you said about considering the physical, emotional, mental, spiritual and medical problems you are creating by eating th is way. You also said something about self hatred. And I beat myself up when I am in the white flour because I can’t control myself. I want to be at peace with myself and I realize that the only way I’m going to be is to put down the white flour. Thank you for being so helpful and thank you for your knowledge. I really enjoy your blogs. Sincerely, Jennifer Bailey

    • H. Theresa Wright July 28, 2018 at 7:04 pm #

      Thank you so much. If you want help with putting down white flour, I am here. Beating my self up is a habit I was taught in childhood, and I know how hard it is to stop. It takes time and work and determination….ooo….could that be a topic for another blog????????? Be gentle with yourself. Both the white flour and the self beating are hard work; it takes time and effort and skill.

  4. Annie Dunn July 25, 2018 at 11:09 am #

    Self care is very important to me. When it slips away I become irritable and discontent, feelings that can lead me to the food. Thank you so much for the clear examples of how to take care of myself!!

    • H. Theresa Wright July 28, 2018 at 6:55 pm #

      Yes, Annie, Restless, Irritable and Discontent! That is me, too, when I don’t take good care of myself! And I don’t know about you, but I can be really creative at ways of not taking care of myself! The self care needs to be planned out and scheduled for me to be able to do it well!

  5. Wendy Loos July 25, 2018 at 11:51 pm #

    Your blog was indeed a blessing, Theresa. I am now doing 15 minutes of clutter clean up daily. In many ways the good feelings that result are like having a wonderful day of abstinence. Both are self-caring mentally, physically and spiritually. How can I tell? God’s peace and a lightness descends and I sense He is saying, “Good job, Wendy. You go, girl!”

    • H. Theresa Wright July 28, 2018 at 6:59 pm #


  6. LEONTYNE R STEELE July 26, 2018 at 5:51 pm #

    I find your posts so very encouraging. You get right to the heart of the matter and give me an opportunity to listen, learn and reflect. I appreciate what you share and have benefitted from your experience. Thank you for taking the time to write these posts.

    • H. Theresa Wright July 28, 2018 at 6:50 pm #

      Thank you so much!

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