When a new client comes to me for the first time, I ask her something like, “Tell me about the food and tell me how to help you”. I get a wide range of answers to this question. Some of the answers really concern me. Things like this:
“I don’t think anyone can help me! I cannot stop eating. Once I get started, I cannot quit!”
“I’ve tried every diet on the planet – Weight Watchers, Nutrisystem, Keto, Paleo, and they all work for a little bit; then I make one mistake and I am in the soup and I cannot get back on it!”
“I am a stupid hopeless failure; I don’t think anyone can help me!”
“I hate myself! I hate my body!”
I feel deep sorrow for the people who say things like this. Solving a food or eating problem is hard work. It takes time and patience to learn how to handle a new food plan. And because most of America has a problem with food, eating and body weight, there are some difficult choices to be made.
But I believe we are entirely on the wrong track with our treatment of weight problems in America today. I believe that obesity is the symptom, the cause, or the result of some other problem; until we solve that problem, no progress in weight loss will last.
The Course in Miracles has said that the body is given to the mind as a tool for learning and growth. The body is given to the mind to help it do its work on the planet. If you are in a war with your body, the process of your accomplishing anything else gets postponed.
And the body is the servant of the mind. The body does its best to accommodate the wishes of the mind. It handles all the high calorie nutrient free foods the mind gives it, and stores it as fat. The body handles your periods of starvation as well as it can, by losing weight, and trying to conserve its cells from further damage. And did you ever think about how the chicken and vegetables and fruit you ate yesterday are today beginning to become you heart or tongue or liver or eyeballs? The body uses the nutrients we give it to repair and replace the body’s organs and tissues, then stores the excess as fat.
The body, then is a servant of the mind. When you say things like “I am fat, stupid and ugly” and” I am a fat, worthless, useless person,” the body listens to that and thinks that is what you want. What you say when you talk to your self is what the body perceives as what you want to draw into your life. The body will do its best to do whatever you ask of it.
So, when you say these rude and mean things to the body, you the mind are telling it what you want. Is what you say to the body today what you really want to draw into your life?
Let’s speak more kindly to our precious bodies. (Where else do you intend to live?) If you would not say it to your spouse, your boss, your best friend, or your favorite dietitian, please do not say it to yourself.
Practice saying positive and gentle things to the body and see how quickly it responds. Try this:
“Body, I am sorry for speaking to you so rudely. We do have some problems to work on, but I am going to try to speak to you more kindly. “
“Body I am going to begin feeding you nutrient rich foods so you can be healthy and strong.”
“Body, I am reaching out for the help we need.”
“I refuse to see myself as a failure. I have worked really hard and accomplished a lot in my job. I want to be smart, skinny, and worthwhile.
I am a good and decent woman and I am doing the best I can.”
”I am a person of great value. I am reaching out to find more effective help.”
“I have made many mistakes; they are on the past. Beginning today I am practicing treating my body with dignity and respect.”
Thank you body, for working so hard to help me and keep me moving.”
Saying positive things to yourself like this can be hard work. When you hear yourself saying rude and nasty things to yourself, say “STOP! CANCEL!” and then say a positive sentence; one of these or anything you wish, as long as it is positive and loving to the body.
If you try this, you will be amazed at how much better you feel and how much more progress you can make in reaching your goals.
Have a great week and check out our two new programs; one starts next week, the other starts in two weeks.
Blessings to you,