So often, my clients talk to me about their feelings of not being “like” other people; of being strange, useless, hopeless, failures, and unworthy or “broken”. You have tried so many diets and weight loss programs, and they all have failed you. But they make you feel like YOU are the failure.
I believe it is the struggles that make us stronger. Taking on a challenge, working through the hard stuff, helps us to grow emotionally and spiritually, whether we resolve the issue positively or negatively.
We still learn.
The hurts of our childhoods, teenagerhoods, adulthoods, can be allowed to destroy us or can be used to strengthen us and to give us the ability to help and heal others. And first, we need to heal ourselves.
I recently found a most interesting way of looking at this issue. It is called, Kintsugi. It is the Japanese art of repairing ceramics with gold, silver, or another metallic adhesive. The philosophy of Kintsugi is to take the broken pieces and repair the item and restore brokenness so that the piece is more beautiful and stronger than it was before it was broken. It looks like this:
The kintsugi technique was probably invented around the fifteenth century; after a shogun broke his favorite tea cup and sent it to China to get it repaired. They were unable to repair it. So, Ashikaga Yosimasa decided to try to have some Japanese craftsmen repair it. They were surprised at the shogun’s steadfastness, so they decided to transform the cup into a jewel by filling its cracks with lacquered resin and powdered gold. This began a huge transformation, eventually developing the tea ceremonies, a major cultural movement, and Ikebana, the way of flower arranging (also called Kado – Way of Flowers) traditions, the Noh theatre, and the Chinese style of painting with ink.
What does this have to do with your food? Everything!
My daughter bought me a shirt: it says, “We are all broken; that’s how the light gets in”
When you have struggled and worked, and things have not gone well, it is your choice whether to toss out your tea cup or use it to make your life more as you want it. If you have a mistake, it is your choice to fall back into the old ways or to learn from the experience and change you and let yourself grow stronger.
We who struggle are the ones who become strong. We who embrace our addictions and work on our issues are the ones who recover.
If you see yourself as broken, this gives your Higher Power space to let you grow, learn, and become even more beautiful and precious than before.
“The kintsugi technique suggests many things. We shouldn’t throw away broken objects. When an object breaks, it doesn’t mean that it is no more useful. Its breakages can become valuable. We should try to repair things because sometimes in doing so we obtain more valuable objects. This is the essence of resilience. Each of us should look for a way to cope with traumatic events in a positive way, learn from negative experiences, take the best from them and convince ourselves that exactly these experiences make each person unique, precious.” (https://www.lifegate.com/kintsugi)
I love the message of “beauty” that “kintsugi” offers me. Rather than seeing my scars in a negative light, I can see the scar in a positive light – as making me strong and useful again. Rather than hide and mask that which is most sensitive and traumatic in my life, I can use the scars to help transform myself and others.
We can move beyond our pain to create a new story for our lives and become a source of strength for others.
OUR SCARS ARE WHAT MAKE US BEAUTIFUL AND STRONG.
The photos come from the Etsy website; www.etsy.com
The text combines several articles on this ancient art of Kintsugi:
Blessings to you,